My goals for this piece are to add another 300-500 words (which should be easy enough), and overall improve the literary value of the beginning half, and overall improve the analytical value of the second half.
Here are the instructions on this essay, note that I am applying for both the BSGD and BAGD programs, important things are in bold:
Instructions from the DigiPen website
Character or World Analysis
Required for: BSGD applicants only (BAGD applicants are invited to submit this as an optional component).
Description: For this application component, you are to select one of these character or world images to analyze. After you have viewed the picture, please write a two-page essay about this image.
If you select a character image to analyze, you must create a background story for the character. For example, you might explain how this character became a warrior or a scientist or whatever profession you see it doing. What led the character to select this profession? How do others react to the character? Additionally, you will need to provide a complete and concise overview of the character, including the following items:
-Name, home (or culture), and class/status.
-Characteristics, skills, talents, or powers.
-Type of game (strategy, first-person shooter, arcade, etc.) you see them in.
-Character motivation: what pushes them on a challenge or adventure?
-Fighting style, if any.
-Other relevant attributes.
If you select a world location to analyze, you must explain the following:
-Type of game that could take place there: think outside the box.
-Type of world it is: futuristic, present day, fantasy, Western, science fiction, etc.
-Culture or civilization existing in this world.
-World obstacles that hinder a player: for example, oceans limiting player movement, etc.
-Ecology of the world as it relates to gameplay.
-Other relevant characteristics.
BSGD applicants are being asked to do this so that we may evaluate their ability to think creatively and to communicate their ideas. Please keep in mind that this should be written as an essay rather than simply a list of details. Whether you choose a character or world image to analyze, be sure to explain how details in the image led you to make your conclusions about the character or world.
For either the Character Analysis or World Analysis, you may expand on the items listed above; at a minimum, however, you must address those listed. Additional instructions about the Character and World Analysis essays may be posted along with the images to select from and analyze.
Required for: BSGD applicants only (BAGD applicants are invited to submit this as an optional component).
Description: For this application component, you are to select one of these character or world images to analyze. After you have viewed the picture, please write a two-page essay about this image.
If you select a character image to analyze, you must create a background story for the character. For example, you might explain how this character became a warrior or a scientist or whatever profession you see it doing. What led the character to select this profession? How do others react to the character? Additionally, you will need to provide a complete and concise overview of the character, including the following items:
-Name, home (or culture), and class/status.
-Characteristics, skills, talents, or powers.
-Type of game (strategy, first-person shooter, arcade, etc.) you see them in.
-Character motivation: what pushes them on a challenge or adventure?
-Fighting style, if any.
-Other relevant attributes.
If you select a world location to analyze, you must explain the following:
-Type of game that could take place there: think outside the box.
-Type of world it is: futuristic, present day, fantasy, Western, science fiction, etc.
-Culture or civilization existing in this world.
-World obstacles that hinder a player: for example, oceans limiting player movement, etc.
-Ecology of the world as it relates to gameplay.
-Other relevant characteristics.
BSGD applicants are being asked to do this so that we may evaluate their ability to think creatively and to communicate their ideas. Please keep in mind that this should be written as an essay rather than simply a list of details. Whether you choose a character or world image to analyze, be sure to explain how details in the image led you to make your conclusions about the character or world.
For either the Character Analysis or World Analysis, you may expand on the items listed above; at a minimum, however, you must address those listed. Additional instructions about the Character and World Analysis essays may be posted along with the images to select from and analyze.
Here is the picture I chose to analyze:
World Picture
Here is my actual essay:
The Essay
World Analysis
Pallor Mortisi : A world which almost fell into the status of “uninhabitable” now sustains what little life still exists on its surface. The planet Pallor Mortis (also the name of the game itself) once thrived as a whole civilization; every edge of the planet radiated peace and safety. As this civilization grew in strength and intelligence, it began developing advanced and dangerous technology. The technologies that the inhabitants of Pallor Mortis created began give the Pallor Mortians incredible advantages and ease of living. Though, these good qualities were also balanced out with a negative effect upon the planet itself; these technologies caused the planet Pallor Mortis to deteriorate. Other races living in the same galaxy as Pallor Mortis decided that Pallor Mortis itself was worth more than its inhabitants (inhabitable planets are few and far between), and set out on a mission to eradicate all sentient life on Pallor Mortis -if the Pallor Mortians didn’t stop the production and use of dangerous technology. Though, this request was all too late, as the Pallor Mortians grew addicted and attached to their technological advancements. Blindly wielding devastating technology the Pallor Mortians challenged the rest of the galaxy in defiance. The wars raged upon and around Pallor Mortis left every city, every canyon, and every mountain on the planet in a looming grey haze; hence such a gloomy name for the planet. As a result of this haze large vegetation quickly died off due to a lack of direct sunlight, leaving only small brush and grassy plant life. A lack of root systems to hold together the terrain of the planet resulted in massive erosion from rivers and rains, creating entangled mazes of plateaus, canyons, and mountainous stretches of land. Wherever these plateaus or cliffs aren’t are swamps and an ever persisting white haze. As a part of the resistance to save Pallor Mortis, the player is sent to reconstruct cities and recreate the once thriving life of Pallor Mortis. Using what few peaceful Pallor Mortians that survived war, the player is to recreate the once thriving planet, and restore Pallor Mortis to its once golden glow.
The game Pallor Mortis would be based heavily off of Sim City’s core design, as the goal of the game isn’t to overcome a specific enemy, but to restore the entire planet to its once glorious past. However, Sim City is about creating a single city whereas Pallor Mortis has the goal of creating an entire planet from a series of cities. How you construct your cities, where you place them, what your cities produce, or function to do, all affect the player’s ability to reconstruct Pallor Mortis. While creating a city, Pallor Mortis will be similar to Sim City in terms of how the player constructs that particular city. Though during construction other cities created by the player have a direct influence over what happens to the city currently being created, whether it be affected by total population immigration//emigration, available resources, or overall productivity of the cities commercial network.
The task of revitalizing Pallor Mortis will not be a completely peaceful task, as the creatures that lived under the reign of the Pallor Mortians now run rampant without the Pallor Mortians to keep them in hiding. Sea creatures, creatures of the deep and massive roaming beasts of the swamps all live freely and wildly upon Pallor Mortis. Aside from these chaotic neutral beasts that roam freely, the player has a grand variety of obstacles that require unique and innovative solutions to allow cities to prosper. These obstacles include natural disasters, geographical isolation from other cities or planetary resources, exotic climates//geography (e.g. creating cities in underground spaces for mining purposes, or demolishing an ancient city to make way for a new one), social uprisings, and overall resource budgets from the other planets of the galaxy.
When I first looked upon this picture, I noted that the world looked very gloomy. This gloom was obviously a result of the grey haze hovering over the water as well as the shady looking sky. Though this picture does contain green, there seems to be no blue anywhere at all in the picture, most likely to emphasize a lack of clear sky or lack of happiness in the world overall. Though the sun seems to break through and shine upon a small stream, you don’t actually see the sun in the picture, giving me an autumn chill of overall cold. The most notable of features in this picture are the large protruding spiky formations seen off in the distance. The structures resemble ancient statues, ancient bones, they seem to be something that was long ago grand and majestic. These structures are the focus of the entire picture, so I decided that they needed to be a rather important aspect of the analysis; these are remnants of the Pallor Mortian’s cities that thrived before war broke out. These buildings were once apart of a Pallor Mortian city and now exist in the gloom and hazy aftermath of war, empty and cold. The picture also exhibited a lack of any larger vegetation, so I easily explained that the haze left from war was the direct cause of a lack of larger vegetation. The aspect of this picture was the immaculate cliffs to the right of the city. An easy explanation of these cliffs could be rapid erosion caused by a lack of root structures created by the once ancient and grand vegetation. As an accent to the entire picture, the artist placed a small animal drinking water in the gloomy scope of land. This is the only life that is shown in the entire picture, and this correlates well with my story of Pallor Mortis, in that the war left a rather small portion of life existing upon the planet. Overall the picture gave me a very swampy, desolate, cold, and frozen feeling (frozen as in motionless). I used this feeling as the basis for constructing my analysis of the picture, and implemented it by describing Pallor Mortis as a war torn “empty leftover shell” of a planet.
i (Pallor mortis: a postmortem paleness which happens in those with light skin almost instantly (in the 15–120 minutes after the death) due to a lack of capillary circulation throughout the body) Wikipedia.org
Pallor Mortisi : A world which almost fell into the status of “uninhabitable” now sustains what little life still exists on its surface. The planet Pallor Mortis (also the name of the game itself) once thrived as a whole civilization; every edge of the planet radiated peace and safety. As this civilization grew in strength and intelligence, it began developing advanced and dangerous technology. The technologies that the inhabitants of Pallor Mortis created began give the Pallor Mortians incredible advantages and ease of living. Though, these good qualities were also balanced out with a negative effect upon the planet itself; these technologies caused the planet Pallor Mortis to deteriorate. Other races living in the same galaxy as Pallor Mortis decided that Pallor Mortis itself was worth more than its inhabitants (inhabitable planets are few and far between), and set out on a mission to eradicate all sentient life on Pallor Mortis -if the Pallor Mortians didn’t stop the production and use of dangerous technology. Though, this request was all too late, as the Pallor Mortians grew addicted and attached to their technological advancements. Blindly wielding devastating technology the Pallor Mortians challenged the rest of the galaxy in defiance. The wars raged upon and around Pallor Mortis left every city, every canyon, and every mountain on the planet in a looming grey haze; hence such a gloomy name for the planet. As a result of this haze large vegetation quickly died off due to a lack of direct sunlight, leaving only small brush and grassy plant life. A lack of root systems to hold together the terrain of the planet resulted in massive erosion from rivers and rains, creating entangled mazes of plateaus, canyons, and mountainous stretches of land. Wherever these plateaus or cliffs aren’t are swamps and an ever persisting white haze. As a part of the resistance to save Pallor Mortis, the player is sent to reconstruct cities and recreate the once thriving life of Pallor Mortis. Using what few peaceful Pallor Mortians that survived war, the player is to recreate the once thriving planet, and restore Pallor Mortis to its once golden glow.
The game Pallor Mortis would be based heavily off of Sim City’s core design, as the goal of the game isn’t to overcome a specific enemy, but to restore the entire planet to its once glorious past. However, Sim City is about creating a single city whereas Pallor Mortis has the goal of creating an entire planet from a series of cities. How you construct your cities, where you place them, what your cities produce, or function to do, all affect the player’s ability to reconstruct Pallor Mortis. While creating a city, Pallor Mortis will be similar to Sim City in terms of how the player constructs that particular city. Though during construction other cities created by the player have a direct influence over what happens to the city currently being created, whether it be affected by total population immigration//emigration, available resources, or overall productivity of the cities commercial network.
The task of revitalizing Pallor Mortis will not be a completely peaceful task, as the creatures that lived under the reign of the Pallor Mortians now run rampant without the Pallor Mortians to keep them in hiding. Sea creatures, creatures of the deep and massive roaming beasts of the swamps all live freely and wildly upon Pallor Mortis. Aside from these chaotic neutral beasts that roam freely, the player has a grand variety of obstacles that require unique and innovative solutions to allow cities to prosper. These obstacles include natural disasters, geographical isolation from other cities or planetary resources, exotic climates//geography (e.g. creating cities in underground spaces for mining purposes, or demolishing an ancient city to make way for a new one), social uprisings, and overall resource budgets from the other planets of the galaxy.
When I first looked upon this picture, I noted that the world looked very gloomy. This gloom was obviously a result of the grey haze hovering over the water as well as the shady looking sky. Though this picture does contain green, there seems to be no blue anywhere at all in the picture, most likely to emphasize a lack of clear sky or lack of happiness in the world overall. Though the sun seems to break through and shine upon a small stream, you don’t actually see the sun in the picture, giving me an autumn chill of overall cold. The most notable of features in this picture are the large protruding spiky formations seen off in the distance. The structures resemble ancient statues, ancient bones, they seem to be something that was long ago grand and majestic. These structures are the focus of the entire picture, so I decided that they needed to be a rather important aspect of the analysis; these are remnants of the Pallor Mortian’s cities that thrived before war broke out. These buildings were once apart of a Pallor Mortian city and now exist in the gloom and hazy aftermath of war, empty and cold. The picture also exhibited a lack of any larger vegetation, so I easily explained that the haze left from war was the direct cause of a lack of larger vegetation. The aspect of this picture was the immaculate cliffs to the right of the city. An easy explanation of these cliffs could be rapid erosion caused by a lack of root structures created by the once ancient and grand vegetation. As an accent to the entire picture, the artist placed a small animal drinking water in the gloomy scope of land. This is the only life that is shown in the entire picture, and this correlates well with my story of Pallor Mortis, in that the war left a rather small portion of life existing upon the planet. Overall the picture gave me a very swampy, desolate, cold, and frozen feeling (frozen as in motionless). I used this feeling as the basis for constructing my analysis of the picture, and implemented it by describing Pallor Mortis as a war torn “empty leftover shell” of a planet.
i (Pallor mortis: a postmortem paleness which happens in those with light skin almost instantly (in the 15–120 minutes after the death) due to a lack of capillary circulation throughout the body) Wikipedia.org
Hopefully I can get some feedback! Thanks!
None.
