Jailbait
Nov 29 2010, 12:21 am
By: Sand Wraith  

Nov 29 2010, 12:21 am Sand Wraith Post #1



Lily, loli
My fel heart
Does regard
Trap but tap
Now I pale
I'm in jail.










-

your thoughts?

-

hurrdurr analysis


Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Nov 29 2010, 1:33 am by Sand Wraith.




Nov 29 2010, 1:17 am MadZombie Post #2



Cool theme but I'm not at your level yet so it would be unfair if I criticized it.



None.

Nov 29 2010, 3:11 am Roy Post #3

An artist's depiction of an Extended Unit Death

I think your rhyme pattern is actually:
AA
B
8
CC
D
D




Nov 29 2010, 4:32 am IskatuMesk Post #4

Lord of the Locker Room

I'll admit that I clicked on this link for the Jailbait portion and not the Poem portion.

I'm not a man of poetry. I'm a man of crude deliciousness.



Show them your butt, and when you do, slap it so it creates a sound akin to a chorus of screaming spider monkeys flogging a chime with cacti. Only then can you find your destiny at the tip of the shaft.

Nov 29 2010, 4:37 am The Starport Post #5



Needs moar Big Black Cock.



None.

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